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4replies
Sarah says:
I loved reading this article today; my husband is also ENTJ who is so direct that he offends people. He did so well as a naval officer for 11 years — in the military, his superiors valued his directness and didn’t expect him to cater to anyone’s feelings. But for the past 5 years in the civilian work world, he has constantly had to deal with people who love the incredible results he delivers, but hate his personality. In the past they promoted him anyway because no one can do what he does, but lately things have come to a head and his bosses are trying to shunt him into a lateral move because he’s pissed too many people off. They want him to stop being so honest, but I was telling him the same thing as you wrote in your article — that his ability to see the BS and call people on it is one of his greatest strengths, and instead of trying to change that, he should find a new position where people will value that.
Joyce says:
Thank you for this post. I’m INFP, and all my life I’ve been doing things to overcome my weaknesses. Study in a science high school and major in electronics engineering to have a technical and high-earning job. Shift to diplomacy to be more sociable and have a stable government job. Study law because we had legal problems and to be more confident and have a high-paying career. I’m now practicing law but it’s exhausting to be always working on my weaknesses. In fact, ever since high school, I considered myself depressed.
Sad to say that knowing about one’s strengths does not necessarily mean that one will always focus on them. I knew about my INFP type since my last year of college, so I used it to find jobs as a writer and a researcher, which I both enjoyed. Why did I leave those jobs? My mother who is ENFP and former military asked me twice, first to visit relatives abroad and next to study law. I don’t think law was a good fit for me then, but I studied it and am still practicing it now because I believe it will make my mother proud. Even though my mother said that I do not have to become a military lawyer and I can be anyone I want, my desire to please her trumps my need to work on a job that reflects who I am.
Anyway, I tried to find my other strengths. First, I took Strengths Finder 2.0 and got these strengths: context, connectedness, intellection, adaptability, and resilience. Second, I took the DISC profile test and got high S for steadiness and high C for compliance. I also got my HEXACO results: average honesty-humility and emotionality, low extraversion, high agreeableness, average conscientiousness, and high openness to experience. Anyway, I got average for honesty-humility because I had low sincerity while my other honesty-humility traits were high. Having low sincerity and high agreeableness tend to make me sacrifice who I am to please others. Maybe Penelope can incorporate HEXACO in this blog as well. Thanks.
Amanda says:
How old do children have to be before they can do the personality test?
Nice article, very true since our childhood we are train to focus on our weaknesses and always try to overcome them and we expect the same with our children without giving it a second thought. Strengths and weaknesses both needs to be given equal importance.
I loved reading this article today; my husband is also ENTJ who is so direct that he offends people. He did so well as a naval officer for 11 years — in the military, his superiors valued his directness and didn’t expect him to cater to anyone’s feelings. But for the past 5 years in the civilian work world, he has constantly had to deal with people who love the incredible results he delivers, but hate his personality. In the past they promoted him anyway because no one can do what he does, but lately things have come to a head and his bosses are trying to shunt him into a lateral move because he’s pissed too many people off. They want him to stop being so honest, but I was telling him the same thing as you wrote in your article — that his ability to see the BS and call people on it is one of his greatest strengths, and instead of trying to change that, he should find a new position where people will value that.
Thank you for this post. I’m INFP, and all my life I’ve been doing things to overcome my weaknesses. Study in a science high school and major in electronics engineering to have a technical and high-earning job. Shift to diplomacy to be more sociable and have a stable government job. Study law because we had legal problems and to be more confident and have a high-paying career. I’m now practicing law but it’s exhausting to be always working on my weaknesses. In fact, ever since high school, I considered myself depressed.
Sad to say that knowing about one’s strengths does not necessarily mean that one will always focus on them. I knew about my INFP type since my last year of college, so I used it to find jobs as a writer and a researcher, which I both enjoyed. Why did I leave those jobs? My mother who is ENFP and former military asked me twice, first to visit relatives abroad and next to study law. I don’t think law was a good fit for me then, but I studied it and am still practicing it now because I believe it will make my mother proud. Even though my mother said that I do not have to become a military lawyer and I can be anyone I want, my desire to please her trumps my need to work on a job that reflects who I am.
Anyway, I tried to find my other strengths. First, I took Strengths Finder 2.0 and got these strengths: context, connectedness, intellection, adaptability, and resilience. Second, I took the DISC profile test and got high S for steadiness and high C for compliance. I also got my HEXACO results: average honesty-humility and emotionality, low extraversion, high agreeableness, average conscientiousness, and high openness to experience. Anyway, I got average for honesty-humility because I had low sincerity while my other honesty-humility traits were high. Having low sincerity and high agreeableness tend to make me sacrifice who I am to please others. Maybe Penelope can incorporate HEXACO in this blog as well. Thanks.
How old do children have to be before they can do the personality test?
Nice article, very true since our childhood we are train to focus on our weaknesses and always try to overcome them and we expect the same with our children without giving it a second thought. Strengths and weaknesses both needs to be given equal importance.