My son is selling 3D graphics online. He is teaching himself via YouTube and marketing his services via multiplayer game chat sessions. When I used to think everyone should be an entrepreneur, I would have encouraged my son to grow his business.

And I’m tempted to now anyway, because the odds of my son having a great graphics business are a lot higher than my son having a great career as a cello soloist. But you can’t change who you are.

And it became clear to me recently that my sons sees creating YouTube intros as a performance, a lot like cello. It’s just that kids online don’t understand cello, so my creates 3D graphics that dance to music. He made that one for OllyAwesome’s channel. I’m not sure if my son got paid; I think he is in it because he loves the moment of performance when he delivers the graphics .

My son is an ESFP. He was born to be a performer.

I am an ENTJ. I was born to run a business. We can try to adapt to the needs of our lives, but we can’t change who we are.

Not very many people have the personality to run their own business. For example, the most common trait of a startup founder is that they don’t care about people, only ideas. So that means that if your daughters care about other peoples’ feelings in even a pretty normal, caring way, they are not going to be top-flight entrepreneurs.

Then there are the tasks involved in working for yourself. You have to be great at marketing because that’s how you get clients. Working for yourself means marketing 80% of the time and doing the actual work 20% of the time. Not very many people like marketing that much.

And the hours. People who have their own businesses work longer hours than people who work for someone else. If you work for someone else your work has a start and an end. If you work for yourself, the work never ends. You can choose what hours you work if you work for yourself, but you work much longer hours than most people want to.

I think we all want stability in life. There are a lot of ways to get it besides working for yourself. Ideas:

  • Spend less than you earn.
  • Live in an inexpensive city.
  • Choose a spouse that is stable.
  • Choose a spouse that is high-earning.
  • Focus on feeling optimistic instead of feeling financially independent—optimism is more important for happiness.

This is all to say that you need to know your child’s personality type before you start hammering home the idea that working for themselves is important. If you know your child has the personality type to work for themselves, you can search on my career blog in the entrepreneurship category. People are born with skills for entrepreneurship, so a 30 year old is no more qualified than a 12 year old—if they are both born with the skills. Here’s a list of posts about entrepreneurship:

If you don’t know your child’s personality type, I can’t stress enough how important it is to find out and to start helping your child form goals that are true to her. There is nothing worse than taking a child who has no penchant for entrepreneurship and telling her for her whole childhood that that’s the best life to lead.

Here is a course I did on understanding your child’s personality type. I think you would benefit from this so much.

Understand Your Child’s Personality Type

And if your child is an ENFP, INTJ or INFJ, here are links to three courses especially for career paths for those three types:

Open Doors and Change the World with ENFP Magnetism

Be Your Real INFJ Self Without Feeling Frustrated

Best Practices for Leveraging INTJ Strengths