I think by now that you know I think you should homeschool your kids. And I think you should not use curriculum. And I don’t care that I am the stereotype of the recent convert who is an intolerable zealot.
Because you know what? I think it’s okay to judge people. I don’t think everyone can just do what they want and it doesn’t matter. And I don’t think most of us believe this, fundamentally.
I think moms who say “let’s not judge each other” are the moms who are scared of being judged. But if you believe you’re doing a good job parenting, then you don’t need to worry about being judged. Maybe they don’t know what you know about your parenting. But frankly, that’s unlikely. And it’s likely that if most people think you are sub-par then you are sub-par. I learned this from my blog. People criticize me in the comments section, and in general, the majority opinion has value. They don’t know everything about me, that’s true. But no one is unique. We are all pretty average, which is, of course, the definition of average.
It’s better parenting to breastfeed. It’s better parenting to read to your kid each day. It’s better parenting to eat meals as a family. These are not gray areas. If you are not doing this stuff then you decided that you want to do something besides what we know is good parenting.
This is a picture of a day when I stayed in bed for most of the day. I have a rule for myself that I can’t do that anymore. But I did it. Have you ever been sleepy with anxiety? I get that. Too much anxiety turns to depression which turns into sleep.
I woke up around 1pm and the photo above is what the kids looked like. It’s a photo of lousy parenting (and resilient kids).
We all make decisions to be sub-par parents at some points in time. We need to accept criticism for that and move on.
And then, we need to dish it out, as well. Because we are each better parents when there are standards that a community holds its members to.